{"id":7011,"date":"2019-08-21T15:49:10","date_gmt":"2019-08-21T19:49:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/?p=7011"},"modified":"2019-08-21T15:49:10","modified_gmt":"2019-08-21T19:49:10","slug":"nsfw-shakespeare-pick-up-lines","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/archives\/7011","title":{"rendered":"NSFW: Shakespeare Pick-Up Lines"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s hard to meet people these days.  You may have even seen some online lists of <a href=\"http:\/\/pun.me\/pages\/cheesy-pick-up-lines.php\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\">pick-up lines<\/a>, quick conversation starters for approaching women in bars.  <\/p>\n<p>But what if the object of your affection is a Shakespeare fan?  Below you will find a list of sure-fire Shakespeare-themed pick-up lines that are guaranteed to breed love&#8217;s settled passions in her heart.<\/p>\n<p>Note: This is a parody. Always treat others with respect, and never actually use any of these rude pick-up lines on a real woman in a bar*.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Excuse me, but are you Joan of Arc?  Because you are smoking hot.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Hi, you can call me King Lear.  Because I\u2019m mad about you.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Do I remind you of Richard III?  Because I have a good hunch about us.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Are you the Dauphin?  Because thou hast turned my balls to gunstones.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Are you Nick Bottom?  Because you are the finest piece of ass I\u2019ve ever seen.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Right now, I feel like young Arthur from <em>King John<\/em>.  Because I just fell for you.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>If I told you I was Hamlet, would you let me Ophelia?<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>Are you Shylock?  Because I want to give you a pound of flesh.<\/li>\n<p><\/p>\n<li>You and I are like Kate and Petruchio in <em>The Taming of the Shrew<\/em>.  Because at the end, I bet I can get you to come.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><\/p>\n<p>Good luck, and have fun!<\/p>\n<p>&#8212;<\/p>\n<p>*I have actually used all of these lines on a real woman in a bar.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s hard to meet people these days. You may have even seen some online lists of pick-up lines, quick conversation starters for approaching women in bars. But what if the object of your affection is a Shakespeare fan? Below you will find a list of sure-fire Shakespeare-themed pick-up lines that are guaranteed to breed love&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[91,113,4,12,58,40,63,123,92,3,118,93,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7011","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hamlet","category-histories","category-history","category-humor","category-king-lear","category-list","category-meme","category-merchant-of-venice","category-richard-iii","category-shakespeare","category-taming-of-the-shrew","category-the-dream","category-plantagenets"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7011","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7011"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7011\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7025,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7011\/revisions\/7025"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7011"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7011"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.shakespeareteacher.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7011"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}